Sept. 21- Oncologist

Well, today I finally met the oncologist.  He said that my cancer looks pretty good and has a fairly low risk of reoccurence ( 10-15%).  If I were past menopause, he wouldn't recommend chemo. Since I am not, he is going to run one more test, which will give the exact reoccurence percent and then we will determine if I need chemo or not. He thinks my score should come back low, but I do not want to get my hopes up.  The test results will be in two weeks.  This means I have 2 weeks to feel like me and be normal.   Yay normal!!!

Sept. 14th- I have a ????

Back to the surgeon today for a check up on my second surgery.  I still had some swelling, hardness and discomfort, but thought it was normal. Well, when she looked at me, she said that I now have developed a seroma- a fluid build up.  She said that I could leave it for my body to absorb over time or get it drained to ease discomfort, but it would come back.  I said "Drain it, I've been wearing two bras".  So, she takes me in another room, numbs my breast and drains about 90cc of fluid out. She proceeds to tell me that my breast will now have a huge dent in it until it fills back up.  The hope is that the fluid will take longer to come back and less fluid each time. I can have it drained each time or tough it out.  Well, I instantly felt better and was so happy she drained it.  I couldn't wait to get home for my long, daily walk.  My walks have been my sense of peace and comfort. 
So, it looks as if this is going to be an inconvenience, but it's okay.  I have my breast.  I still love my saggy, droopy, hematoma, seroma, scarred, dented in breast!!!!

Sept. 12th

Rough Day!  Not sure why?  I have been on the verge of tears all day.  I just don't want to have to go through all this.  I really don't want chemo and I hate not knowing if I will need it or not.  I don't want radiation.  I really, really do not want to take a drug to put me in immediate, drug induced menopause.  Tomorrow will be better! 

Sept. 10th

Good news!  Around 3:00 today, the surgeon called me with my HER-2 results ( the test they had to do again).  It came back 1.6, which is negative!   YAY!  This is huge news.  This means my cancer is not super aggressive and puts me in a lower risk of reoccurence.  This should help lower the chance I need chemo.  I was again overwhelmed with the good news. God is working in my life.  I hope everyone has a great weekend!

Sept. 9th

OUCH!  I woke up in quite a bot of more pain this time.  I guess that's a good thing, so I won't overdo it.  Luckily, I still am not in a ton of pain- no pain med needed. I promise to take it easy this time.

Sept. 8th

Surgery Day
Surgery was moved up an hour- but it ended up that it actually didn't get started untl about 90 minutes late.  When I woke up, the surgeon said that she got about 200 cc of blood out, which was a lot.   I was glad to get home and have the surgery done with.  Brandon was worried about me, so he came over for a few hours, but once he knew I was okay, he headed back to his dad's. 

Sept. 7th

I am finally getting around to updating everyone. First and foremost, thank you all so much for your prayers and support. I feel blessed to know so many wonderful people in my life. It's amazing how much my life has changed in a few short weeks. After the initial, devastating phone call, I knew I would never be the same- I would be better, stronger and so much more appreciative of every single day! Then came all the tests which would first determine if I was going to get to keep my breasts. The day I heard that I could keep my boobs was honestly in the top 10 of happy days of my life. I vowed to never complain about my saggy droopy breasts- I love my saggy, droopy breasts.


I had the lumpectomy last Wednesday. The surgery went very well. I was not in very much pain. They got clear margins and my lymph nodes were clear- praise God! - another answered prayer. I was feeling so good that I decided to take a long walk and clean my house. Well, I burst a blood vessel and developed a large, painful hematoma ( collection of blood at the surgery site) . So now, I have one breast that is a D cup and the other one at least a DDD. My mom gave me a boob pad for my non-hematoma hooter to even me out. Whew baby- I was sporting some gigantic boobs, with the most interesting arrays of colors I have ever seen. Well, today at my post op checkup, the surgeon said that I need to head back to surgery tomorrow to vacuum out the hematoma ( isn't it ironic that I think when I vacuumed the house is when I caused all this and now they have to vacuum out me) . Actually, think it's kind of funny.

I am waiting on one more important test result and then I will meet with the oncologist to see about chemo. I SO hope not! I will definitely need 7 weeks of daily radiation. If I need chemo, it will come first and then radiation. I will have to take a pill for five years that lowers my estrogen- my tumor absolutely loved my estrogen, which they say is a good thing. This pill will instantly put me into full blown menopause, with the lovely side effects of hot flashes, night sweats, weight gain, and general crabbiness. Good news is I'll be done with menopause long before all you all and then I can laugh at you when you get hot flashes- just kidding- well, maybe not!

So, for all you nerds, like me, here's all the scientific stuff. I have invasive ductile carcinoma. Grade 1 ( this is good). Estrogen and progestin positive ( this is good too), tumor size was 1.1 cm ( under 1 cm is best, but under 2 cm is still good). Stage 1 cancer. HER-2 status ( 1.8 , which is in the middle and this is being retested- a score above 2.2 means the cancer was aggressive and chemo will definitely be needed)

Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers. Again, thank you for the prayers, cards, emails, meals, everything! I honestly do not feel sad for myself- I feel blessed to have such wonderful people in my life. Hugs and kisses!

Renee